WORTHACHARM

“Hey Siri, play 20 Something by SZA”

So they say our 20’s are supposed to be the best times of your life and don’t get me wrong they have been fun, but it is also the most confusing time of our life. We’re spending your our twenties either being in college, working, parenting, paying bills, being married, and trying to have the time of our life. Though we are also having to face the multitudes of changes that comes with it. Rather it is figuring out who we are and who we want to be, wishing to be a kid again, thinking about how we may survive to the next day, still living with our parents, and navigating the freedom we have now. I can on all day of the things we face in life as an adult.

Best Time of Your Life: Your twenties are supposed to be fun because we are young, and we will never get this time back. Though, life does happens and you may have put the fun on pause sometimes, but never the less, you have ten years to make the best of it despite the challenges. While we have the time now, let’s not miss our moment to enjoy being this young as an adult. Take the trips, explore hobbies, spend as much time with your friends and family as you can, go explore and try new things. Most importantly, do the things that make you happy and feel good to be alive. Don’t let people and the things in life hold you back from doing so. This is the most difficult thing sometimes because some of us do not know how to balance working/hustling and adding the time for fun. Yes, we have responsibilities and we are adults, but we can’t forget to enjoy our life. Let’s use “oh, you are still so young” to our advantage. We deserve to feel the joy of life now.

Learning About Life: As a person in her mid-twenties, I can honestly say making mistakes as adult versus a child hits different. As an adult, one mistake may set you back for some time rather it’s financially, mentally, or physically. I’m learning if you don’t act on correcting your mistakes at the time, then life will definitely give you no choice to do so. Another thing is as human we are constantly learning, so while you may be going through one thing, you are learning from another issue. During this time in life, we are starting to understanding that we do not know everything and we’re constantly finding something new that we need to work on with ourselves or circumstances.

Life Comes at You Fast: Man, can we talk about how fast life comes at you. I understand why they say to enjoy our twenties because it does go by so fast. But they don’t talk about how there isn’t no preparation stage to be prepared for your twenties, it’s just like boom you’re an adult now, so deal with it. Then, here comes the freedom that we have now, and while it is a beautiful thing, it can be a bit overwhelming. There’s a constant tension between doing what you want and doing what you should. Every day, you’re trying to find the balance between YOLO and being responsible.

The Different Phases: Each year in our twenties has been experiences of different levels of navigating into adulthood. If you are on Twitter, you’ve probably seen those tweets like “25 was tough” and someone comments and say, “wait until 27”, and so far, they are not exaggerating. Each year we are growing and experiencing something that is either making or breaking our twenties, but each year is significant to our growth regardless of how we felt during that time. Also, please do not allow others to belittle your challenges in life because “you are so young” or “you haven’t experience anything yet”. Because newsflash, hardships happens in our “twenties” too!

Navigating Friendships: As we reach deeper into our twenties, we realize that navigating friendships gets harder because now we are all on different schedules, and our lives doesn’t align with one another either anymore. While it’s truly a blessing to have great friendships and a village in your twenties, but I am learning friendships as an adult takes true work just like any other relationship. We also start to notice how our friendships starts to look different as an adult because one of your closest friend is in their 30’s or older, and it’s like wow I am really am adult because why are my friends are 5 years+ older than me lol.

Mental Wellness: The last topic I would like to speak on is our mental health. I feel like at this age our mental is hit so hard due to finally being on our own and trying to navigate this life without the proper guidance and instruction. Everything is based on our choices and decisions and one wrong move or no move at all can really bring us down to where it becomes a dark space for some of us. Not only that, in our twenties we can have our family, friends, community, and still feel lonely. And some of our peers actually don’t make it out because this thing called depression and anxiety takes a toll on us and sometimes wins.

We often think we can handle life on our own and don’t need help, but in reality life be whooping our behind. As I am growing into my twenties, I am learning the importance of community and that you really cannot do life alone, and sometimes we have to put our PRIDE aside and reach out. This is the time in our life when we need to lean into our community, our circles, and to reach out for help. Take it for someone who had multiple therapists because I am at the place where I do need help. And no therapy isn’t going to fix it, but it does help to get the professional help. It’s not the easiest process, but it is a start to growing and moving forward in life. Do not ignore your mental state due to others, remember you matter in this world and God has so much more in store for you. If you’re feeling lost in your twenties, you’re not alone. This decade is not just about thriving, but it’s about learning, healing, stumbling, growing, falling apart, and putting yourself back together.

So be kind to yourself. Let go of the pressure to have it all figured out. You’re doing better than you think.

Part 2 is coming soon because there is still so much I want to speak on with this topic.